New Years has never been a favorite holiday for me. It's always unbelievably awkward or unbelievably boring or just a blur. Last year, I went and saw P.S. I Love You by myself at 1030 and then got home and went to bed. The year before that, I spent with some great friends after a wedding weekend and kissed a boy who is now married. I thought this year was going to be wonderful.
I flew back in to Nashville for yet another wedding and started the day with friends. Picking up some from the airport, visiting with others that I haven't seen in over a year and then with my best friend watching the "on-screen love of my life". I then get back to her apartment, shower up and am putting on my makeup to go to a pre-wedding get-together. Just a typical Wednesday evening. And then it happened. My damn phone rang.
I don't know why he thinks he can just waltz in and out of my life as he pleases, when he pleases, but I'm tired of it. How am I supposed to put on my makeup when I can't help but cry? I really don't think he has any idea of just how stressed out and how much of a whirlwind he can send me on with just a single word. It drives me absolutely crazy! I mean really? Do you really expect everything to be just fine just because you say you're sorry? What if I'm not ready to just treat it like water under a bridge? unbelievable.
dear taylor swift,
how did you know? regardless, sing me to sleep.
all this time i was wasting hoping you would come around
i've been giving out chances every time but all you do is let me down
and it's taken me this long, baby, but i've figured you out
and you're thinking we'll be fine again but not this time around
you don't have to call anymore
i won't pick up the phone
this is the last straw
don't want to hurt anymore
and you can tell me that you're sorry
but i don't believe you, baby, like i did before
you're not sorry
you're looking so innocent, i might believe you if i didn't know
i could've loved you all my life if you hadn't left me waiting in the cold
and you've got your share of secrets but i'm tired of being less than known
now you're asking me to listen because it's worked each time before
you got me going for you honey and it never would've gone away
you used to shine so bright but i watched all of it fade
you don't have to call anymore
i won't pick up the phone
this is the last straw
there's nothing left to beg for
and you can tell me that you're sorry
but i don't believe you, baby like i did before
you're not sorry
